Tanya O'Debra

...a haven for tender artistic feelings... ...a refuge for tears to be shead... ...poetry... ...suicide...

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

...war and poos...

I've decided to keep a loose record of my bowel movements. I highly recommend this as an activity. It gives me more pleasure than it really ought to. Like, I said, it's fairly loose. Sometimes I forget to make entries. Here's what I have so far. Enjoy!

11/5/06 3:53pm
Three round droppings in quick succession. Diane was here.

11/8/06 5:28pm
One large plop, swift and heavy.

11/9/06 12:35am
Seven tiny nuggets make seven separate splashes. To much effort for such a small return.

11/10/06 6:56pm
After holding back for several hours, a premenstrual bohemoth forged its way into the world, the very point of its head peeking above the water's surface. Gratifying. A huge relief.

11/14/06 1:02pm
Dark, dry and brittle. Perhaps I should drink more water.

11/16/06 3:59pm
Small, two pieces, bland. A let down after being held in for a few hours.

11/17/06 3:29pm
A mass exodus one hour after eating Indian food. Memorable and horrifying.

11/29/06 6:47
Nothing special, really. Medium in every way.

Seriously, I can't stop laughing. If you want to make yourself feel better about life, you should keep a poo journal.